It’s A Thin Line| Let’s Argue…In Love!

Just because I love you doesn’t mean I don’t like you sometimes. Just because I love you doesn’t mean we will never argue or disagree with one another. Just because I love you doesn’t mean you don’t get on my nerves at times, because I’m sure I can work your last nerve, as well. We can argue, as long as it’s all in the name of our love.

The issue is when most couples argue, someone always wants to win. We argue mostly when we want to get our points across or we want to be heard. The problem is everyone’s issues and/or concerns are valid and right to them, so when the other doesn’t agree or understand the argument begins. Most of us aren’t mature in an argument or disagree. That’s just real. Often times we resort to child-like behavior and we want our way by any means necessary. That’s when the nasty words often begin. Ladies when you’re with your man or fellas when you’re with you woman you really don’t listen as well as you should. You just wait for your turn to speak. There is a difference. There is also a difference between hearing and listening. That’s where the frustration lies and that’s when the blow-ups begin.

It’s normal to argue and it’s normal to fight with your words. Some arguments can be healthy, but some can be unhealthy and detrimental to the relationship. You have to learn to choose your battles because everything shouldn’t be a fight or an argument. Words are powerful and they do hurt, contrary to the saying…”Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can/may never hurt me.” I don’t know where that came from, but it’s so not true. Words stick with you and once they escape your mouth, you can’t shove them back in. Once the door to disrespect, negativity and name calling begins it’s hard to close that door. Once you walk through that door you have to be prepared for the consequences. When you truly love your spouse, fiance’ , boyfriend/girlfriend you learn that it’s not always important to be right. When you feel your conversation is getting heated and heading to the left ask yourself a couple of questions, “Do I want to be happy or do I want to be right?”  “Is this argument really worth winning?”  Most times, most arguments aren’t really worth having. You have to love your mate enough to , let it go. It doesn’t make you a loser if you concede. It’s better to love than to fight on any occasion. I choose love, do you? Now I’m not saying you may never have an argument, we are only human, but if you do….argue in the name of love.  Making up is a much faster process when you don’t hit below the belt in a disagreement. Don’t risk your relationship with an argument that was never worth having in the first place.  Keep your mind on the love that you share for one another, with that you can’t go wrong.

Tips For a Loving Argument

  • Fight fair
  • No low blows
  • No  name calling
  • Remember your love for your mate
  • Know when to walk away
  • Stick to the issue at hand (Don’t rehash old situations or topics)
  • No insults
  • Know when to admit when you are wrong
  • Know when to shut up
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